"Patent No. US-11252952-B2"

Remove Lame-Duck President In One Fowl Swoop

Here's how it works: When chief executive signs last-minute pardons, scale (A) tips, lifting cover off Hillary Clinton's superior cookies (B). Angered, Barbara reaches for her spatula (C), tugging typewriter (D) away from Millie who is scribing her tell-all autobiography How I Ran the Presidency Without Even Getting a Biscuit. Millie rushes for the typewriter, causing leash (E) to pull trap-door lever (F), sending George Bush into a bottomless pit of obscurity where Reagan, Carter, Ford and Nixon await him.